三年は長くない - three years is not a long time
Year after year in February, we JETs have to decide whether or not we want to recontract for another year or not. Year after year, my initial answer has always been "I am going home after this year". But my indecisive nature always has me wondering "Do I really want to go back after this year?", "What am I gonna do after JET?", "What are the costs and benefits of staying another year?", "What is the opportunity cost of staying another year -- am I going to earn something greater in income and more rewarding than this job?", "Did I travel to all the places I've always wanted to go to while here?", "Is my Japanese good enough?", all of this times a million. And I actually try to answer these questions too... I drive myself crazy...
And so, I've confused my supervisors and teachers year after year by changing my mind to stay two times in a row. But this year, I decided to stick to my usual "I'm going home after this year" decision. I feel a bit crazy for wanting to go home. My job has gotten so much better starting this contracting year. I only have one junior high school to go to, instead of two. I get to visit elementary schools, which make me super happy. I am surrounded by great friends. And all that awaits me when I return home in this economy is unemployment. But I am done. I don't have a list of reasons, but I am sure of this.
Japan has been so good to me. I've been through all the hardships I needed to stay close to God and develop into a stronger person. I've met so many friends who have been so good to me, and most of these friends are somewhere between 8 and 14 years old. I am dreading the good-bye that I will have to say in July, but I am enjoying now. Thankfully I've practiced good-byes many times year after year when I have to say good-bye to my graduating third year students, the teachers who are asked to rotate to a different school in March, and to friends who decide to leave in July year after year. After I say good-bye to the third years this March, I think I'll be ready. I started my job in junior high school only 4 months after they started junior high school. After they graduate jhs in March, it'll be my turn to graduate Motomiya Daicchugakko in July.
